I want to be annihilated completely, I want reciprocal forgetting, I want the angels not to recognize me.

Redesign Me

a marker of black, preparing for dissection,
wielded by sinewy hands, trembling, yet bold
staining my skin with dashed lines of perfection
this is the first time i have ever felt so cold

peeling back the skin and curving away the bone
you redesign the wires in my brain,
until you have remapped every geographical zone
and with excruciating pain, you metamorphosize me sane

it’s 3 am now and I feel so stupid, happy and numb
you put your arm around me and lean in for a kiss
as I twist against your palms, feeling animal-like and dumb
you talk in old jokes, i smile, but the meaning i miss.

while a hollow mannequin now stands before
the shadow of the girl you used to adore

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